Official Collegiate Merchandise

Excellence
in Apathy.

Since breakfast. Accredited by nobody.
Degrees in nothing. Shop accordingly.

Shop Nope
Required Inventory Gonna Hurt (Lmfao)
Best Seller Hard Pass Tee
The Hard Pass T-Shirt
Structured cotton. Zero ambition. Ideal for most situations.
$24.99
Procrastination Crew
Procrastination Crewneck
Heavy fleece. Will handle it later. Or not. Fine either way.
$45.00
Deep Debt Hoodie
Deep Debt Hoodie
Premium pullover. Worth every cent you definitely don't have.
$55.00
The Syllabus
The Syllabus (Unread)
Canvas tote. Holds your things and your regrets.
$32.00
"I don't know what I'm doing with my life, but at least the hoodie fits." ◆ "Finally, a school that gets me." ◆ "Dropped out before I enrolled. Still got the shirt."
Dean's
List
Dropout
Officially Unofficial
Summa
Cum
Lazy
Certified Unambitious
Est.
Whenever
Accredited by Nobody
Magna
Cum
Later
Degrees in Nothing